Sunday, December 22, 2019

4 secrets to reading body language like an expert

4 secrets to reading body language like an expert4 secrets to reading body language like an expertHow important is body language?About55% of what you convey when you speak comes from body language. In fact, when youre speaking about something emotional only about 7% of what the otzu sich partie hears has to do with the words you use.More often than elend you can tell what a politician thinks about an issue just by watching their hands. Psychopaths can tell who would be a good victim just by watching them walk.In five minutes you can often evaluate people with approximately 70% accuracy. . .but obviously were wrong often, and that 30% can be very costly.What can the research teach us about better reading peoples body language?What youre doing wrongIn The Silent Language of Leaders How Body Language Can Helpor HurtHow You Lead the author points out a number of common errors people make.Heres how I interpreted the findingsIgnoring context Crossed arms dont mean as much if the room is co ld or the chair theyre sitting in doesnt have armrests. Everything has to reisepass the common sense test given the environment.notlage looking for clusters One of the biggest errors people make is looking for one single tell. Thats great in movies about poker players but in real life its a consistent grouping of actions (sweating, touching the face, and stuttering togetzu sich) that is really going to tell you something.Not getting a baseline If someone is always jumpy, jumpiness doesnt tell you anything. If someone is always jumpy and they suddenly stop moving - HELLO.Not being conscious of biases If you already like or dislike the person its going to affect your judgment. And if people compliment you, are similar to you, are attractive these can all sway you, unconsciously. I know, you dont fall for those tricks. Well, the biggest bias of all is thinking youre unbiased.What to focus onWhat signals can and should you trust when trying to get a read on someone? They need to be unc onscious behaviors that are not easily controlled and convey a clear message.In Honest Signals How They Shape Our World, the authors point out three to keep your eye onSpeech mimicry and behavioral mimicry Are they using the same words you use? Speaking at a similar speed and tone? Are they sitting the way you sit? Is a subtle, unconscious game of follow-the-leader going on? This is a sign the otzu sich person feels emotionally in sync with you. It can be faked but thats rare and difficult to pull off consistently across a conversation.Activity level As a general rule, activity levels indicate interest and excitement. (Often when a woman is bouncing zu sich foot during a date it means shes interested in the man shes with.)Consistency of emphasis and timing This is a sign of focus and control. Someone who is less consistent is less sure of themselves and mora open to influence.Specifics to look forContextually vetted, baseline adjusted clusters are your best bet but research has show n some specifics are often decent indicators.Crossed legs are a very bad sign during negotiations.Via The Silent Language of Leaders How Body Language Can Helpor HurtHow You LeadCrossed legs can have a devastating effect on a negotiation. In How to Read a Person Like a Book, authors Gerard I. Nierenberg and Henry H. Calero reported that the number of times settlements were reached increased greatly when both negotiators had uncrossed their legs. In fact, they found that out of two thousand videotaped transactions, not one resulted in a settlement when even one of the negotiators had his or her legs crossed.Theres a consistent cluster that has been seen among people who are trying to cheat you.Via Wray Herbert, author of On Second Thought Outsmarting Your Minds Hard-Wired HabitsAgain and again, it welches a cluster of four cues hand touching, face touching, crossing arms, and leaning away. None of these cues foretold deceit by itself, but together they transformed into a highly accur ate signal. And the more often the participants used this particular cluster of gestures, the less trustworthy they were in the subsequent financial exchange.Who should you trust? Look for people who are consistently emotionally expressive in their body languageThese results suggest that cooperators may be more emotionally expressive than non-cooperators. We speculate that emotional expressivity can be a more reliable signal of cooperativeness than the anzeige of positive emotion alone.And look at peoples hands. Palm down gestures indicate power. Palm up shows submission.The New York Times cites Adam Kendon, author of Gesture Visible Action as Utterance, on the deeper meaning of hand positionsGestures of the Open flosse Prone or palm down family are used in contexts where something is being denied, negated, interrupted or stopped, whether explicitly or by implication. Open hand Supine (or palm up) family gestures, on the other hand, are used in contexts where the speaker is offering , giving or showing something or requesting the reception of something . . .Keep in mind that men and women differ in body language. For instance, they flirt differentlyViaFascinate Your 7 Triggers to Persuasion and CaptivationA female begins fascinating a male by smiling at him, raising her brows to make her eyes appear wider and more childlike, quickly lowering her lids while tucking her chin slightly down, in an effort to bring him closer. After averting her gaze to the side, she will, within moments and almost without exception, put her hands on or near her mouth and giggle, lick her lips, or thrust out her chest while gazing at the object of her intended affection.And its consistent, regardless of language, socioeconomic status, or religious upbringing. For men, says Rodgers, the fascination ritual is less submissive but no less standardized. Hell puff out his chest, jut his chin, arch his back, gesture with his hands and arms, and swagger in dominant motions to draw attention to his powerHow to get better at reading body languageFirst, pay attention. Sounds obvious but youre probably not doing it consistently throughout the conversation.Dynamics change, especially when youre dealing with someone who is actively trying to deceive you. Unless theyre very good, inconsistencies will arise (leakage) and you can get insight into how they really feel.Youll improve dramatically by addressing the four weaknesses pointed out in The Silent Language of LeadersConsider context Should someone in this situation be acting like this?Look for clusters of actions, not isolated ones All three of those behaviors are associated with?Get a baseline How do they normally act?Be aware of your biases Are you tempted to cut them slack and they havent abfluged speaking yet?Your abilities will make a quantum leap if you realize that body language is part of a bigger context and a bigger cluster and you start monitoring the other facets of behavioral interaction voice, appearance, clo thing, etc.These can help you evaluate the whole packageWhat does clothing tell you? How about shoes?What does someones voice tell you?What does a face tell you? How about a quick glance?What are 10 instances when you should trust your gut?Join over 285,000 readers and get a free weekly update via emailhere.Related postsHow To Be Resilient 8 Steps To Success When Life Gets HardWhat 10 things should you do every day to improve your life?How To Make Your Life Better By Sending Five Simple EmailsThis article originally appeared at Barking Up the Wrong Tree.4 secrets to reading body language like an expertHow important is body language?About55% of what you convey when you speak comes from body language. In fact, when youre speaking about something emotional only about 7% of what the other person hears has to do with the words you use.Follow Ladders on FlipboardFollow Ladders magazines on Flipboard covering Happiness, Productivity, Job Satisfaction, Neuroscience, and moreMore often than not you can tell what a politician thinks about an issue just by watching their hands. Psychopaths can tell who would be a good victim just by watching them walk.In five minutes you can often evaluate people with approximately 70% accuracy. . .but obviously were wrong often, and that 30% can be very costly.What can the research teach us about better reading peoples body language?What youre doing wrongIn The Silent Language of Leaders How Body Language Can Helpor HurtHow You Lead the author points out a number of common errors people make.Heres how I interpreted the findingsIgnoring context Crossed arms dont mean as much if the room is cold or the chair theyre sitting in doesnt have armrests. Everything has to pass the common sense test given the environment.Not looking for clusters One of the biggest errors people make is looking for one single tell. Thats great in movies about poker players but in real life its a consistent grouping of actions (sweating, touching the face, and stut tering together) that is really going to tell you something.Not getting a baseline If someone is always jumpy, jumpiness doesnt tell you anything. If someone is always jumpy and they suddenly stop moving - HELLO.Not being conscious of biases If you already like or dislike the person its going to affect your judgment. And if people compliment you, are similar to you, are attractive these can all sway you, unconsciously. I know, you dont fall for those tricks. Well, the biggest bias of all is thinking youre unbiased.What to focus onWhat signals can and should you trust when trying to get a read on someone? They need to be unconscious behaviors that are not easily controlled and convey a clear message.In Honest Signals How They Shape Our World, the authors point out three to keep your eye onSpeech mimicry and behavioral mimicry Are they using the same words you use? Speaking at a similar speed and tone? Are they sitting the way you sit? Is a subtle, unconscious game of follow-the-lead er going on? This is a sign the other person feels emotionally in sync with you. It can be faked but thats rare and difficult to pull off consistently across a conversation.Activity level As a general rule, activity levels indicate interest and excitement. (Often when a woman is bouncing her foot during a date it means shes interested in the man shes with.)Consistency of emphasis and timing This is a sign of focus and control. Someone who is less consistent is less sure of themselves and more open to influence.Specifics to look forContextually vetted, baseline adjusted clusters are your best bet but research has shown some specifics are often decent indicators.Crossed legs are a very bad sign during negotiations.Via The Silent Language of Leaders How Body Language Can Helpor HurtHow You LeadCrossed legs can have a devastating effect on a negotiation. In How to Read a Person Like a Book, authors Gerard I. Nierenberg and Henry H. Calero reported that the number of times settlements we re reached increased greatly when both negotiators had uncrossed their legs. In fact, they found that out of two thousand videotaped transactions, not one resulted in a settlement when even one of the negotiators had his or her legs crossed.Theres a consistent cluster that has been seen among people who are trying to cheat you.Via Wray Herbert, author of On Second Thought Outsmarting Your Minds Hard-Wired HabitsAgain and again, it was a cluster of four cues hand touching, face touching, crossing arms, and leaning away. None of these cues foretold deceit by itself, but together they transformed into a highly accurate signal. And the more often the participants used this particular cluster of gestures, the less trustworthy they were in the subsequent financial exchange.Who should you trust? Look for people who are consistently emotionally expressive in their body languageThese results suggest that cooperators may be more emotionally expressive than non-cooperators. We speculate that e motional expressivity can be a more reliable signal of cooperativeness than the display of positive emotion alone.And look at peoples hands. Palm down gestures indicate power. Palm up shows submission.The New York Times cites Adam Kendon, author of Gesture Visible Action as Utterance, on the deeper meaning of hand positionsGestures of the Open Hand Prone or palm down family are used in contexts where something is being denied, negated, interrupted or stopped, whether explicitly or by implication. Open hand Supine (or palm up) family gestures, on the other hand, are used in contexts where the speaker is offering, giving or showing something or requesting the reception of something . . .Keep in mind that men and women differ in body language. For instance, they flirt differentlyViaFascinate Your 7 Triggers to Persuasion and CaptivationA female begins fascinating a male by smiling at him, raising her brows to make her eyes appear wider and more childlike, quickly lowering her lids whil e tucking her chin slightly down, in an effort to bring him closer. After averting her gaze to the side, she will, within moments and almost without exception, put her hands on or near her mouth and giggle, lick her lips, or thrust out her chest while gazing at the object of her intended affection.And its consistent, regardless of language, socioeconomic status, or religious upbringing. For men, says Rodgers, the fascination ritual is less submissive but no less standardized. Hell puff out his chest, jut his chin, arch his back, gesture with his hands and arms, and swagger in dominant motions to draw attention to his powerHow to get better at reading body languageFirst, pay attention. Sounds obvious but youre probably not doing it consistently throughout the conversation.Dynamics change, especially when youre dealing with someone who is actively trying to deceive you. Unless theyre very good, inconsistencies will arise (leakage) and you can get insight into how they really feel.Youl l improve dramatically by addressing the four weaknesses pointed out in The Silent Language of LeadersConsider context Should someone in this situation be acting like this?Look for clusters of actions, not isolated ones All three of those behaviors are associated with?Get a baseline How do they normally act?Be aware of your biases Are you tempted to cut them slack and they havent started speaking yet?Your abilities will make a quantum leap if you realize that body language is part of a bigger context and a bigger cluster and you start monitoring the other facets of behavioral interaction voice, appearance, clothing, etc.These can help you evaluate the whole packageWhat does clothing tell you? How about shoes?What does someones voice tell you?What does a face tell you? How about a quick glance?What are 10 instances when you should trust your gut?Join over 285,000 readers and get a free weekly update via emailhere.This article originally appeared at Barking Up the Wrong Tree.You might also enjoyNew neuroscience reveals 4 rituals that will make you happyStrangers know your social class in the first seven words you say, study finds10 lessons from Benjamin Franklins daily schedule that will double your productivityThe worst mistakes you can make in an interview, according to 12 CEOs10 habits of mentally strong people4 secrets to reading body language like an expertHow important is body language?About55% of what you convey when you speak comes from body language. In fact, when youre speaking about something emotional only about 7% of what the other person hears has to do with the words you use.More often than not you can tell what a politician thinks about an issue just by watching their hands. Psychopaths can tell who would be a good victim just by watching them walk.In five minutes you can often evaluate people with approximately 70% accuracy. . .but obviously were wrong often, and that 30% can be very costly.What can the research teach us about better reading peo ples body language?What youre doing wrongIn The Silent Language of Leaders How Body Language Can Helpor HurtHow You Lead the author points out a number of common errors people make.Heres how I interpreted the findingsIgnoring context Crossed arms dont mean as much if the room is cold or the chair theyre sitting in doesnt have armrests. Everything has to pass the common sense test given the environment.Not looking for clusters One of the biggest errors people make is looking for one single tell. Thats great in movies about poker players but in real life its a consistent grouping of actions (sweating, touching the face, and stuttering together) that is really going to tell you something.Not getting a baseline If someone is always jumpy, jumpiness doesnt tell you anything. If someone is always jumpy and they suddenly stop moving - HELLO.Not being conscious of biases If you already like or dislike the person its going to affect your judgment. And if people compliment you, are similar t o you, are attractive these can all sway you, unconsciously. I know, you dont fall for those tricks. Well, the biggest bias of all is thinking youre unbiased.What to focus onWhat signals can and should you trust when trying to get a read on someone? They need to be unconscious behaviors that are not easily controlled and convey a clear message.In Honest Signals How They Shape Our World, the authors point out three to keep your eye onSpeech mimicry and behavioral mimicry Are they using the same words you use? Speaking at a similar speed and tone? Are they sitting the way you sit? Is a subtle, unconscious game of follow-the-leader going on? This is a sign the other person feels emotionally in sync with you. It can be faked but thats rare and difficult to pull off consistently across a conversation.Activity level As a general rule, activity levels indicate interest and excitement. (Often when a woman is bouncing her foot during a date it means shes interested in the man shes with.)Cons istency of emphasis and timing This is a sign of focus and control. Someone who is less consistent is less sure of themselves and more open to influence.Specifics to look forContextually vetted, baseline adjusted clusters are your best bet but research has shown some specifics are often decent indicators.Crossed legs are a very bad sign during negotiations.Via The Silent Language of Leaders How Body Language Can Helpor HurtHow You LeadCrossed legs can have a devastating effect on a negotiation. In How to Read a Person Like a Book, authors Gerard I. Nierenberg and Henry H. Calero reported that the number of times settlements were reached increased greatly when both negotiators had uncrossed their legs. In fact, they found that out of two thousand videotaped transactions, not one resulted in a settlement when even one of the negotiators had his or her legs crossed.Theres a consistent cluster that has been seen among people who are trying to cheat you.Via Wray Herbert, author of On Sec ond Thought Outsmarting Your Minds Hard-Wired HabitsAgain and again, it was a cluster of four cues hand touching, face touching, crossing arms, and leaning away. None of these cues foretold deceit by itself, but together they transformed into a highly accurate signal. And the more often the participants used this particular cluster of gestures, the less trustworthy they were in the subsequent financial exchange.Who should you trust? Look for people who are consistently emotionally expressive in their body languageThese results suggest that cooperators may be more emotionally expressive than non-cooperators. We speculate that emotional expressivity can be a more reliable signal of cooperativeness than the display of positive emotion alone.And look at peoples hands. Palm down gestures indicate power. Palm up shows submission.The New York Times cites Adam Kendon, author of Gesture Visible Action as Utterance, on the deeper meaning of hand positionsGestures of the Open Hand Prone or pal m down family are used in contexts where something is being denied, negated, interrupted or stopped, whether explicitly or by implication. Open hand Supine (or palm up) family gestures, on the other hand, are used in contexts where the speaker is offering, giving or showing something or requesting the reception of something . . .Keep in mind that men and women differ in body language. For instance, they flirt differentlyViaFascinate Your 7 Triggers to Persuasion and CaptivationA female begins fascinating a male by smiling at him, raising her brows to make her eyes appear wider and more childlike, quickly lowering her lids while tucking her chin slightly down, in an effort to bring him closer. After averting her gaze to the side, she will, within moments and almost without exception, put her hands on or near her mouth and giggle, lick her lips, or thrust out her chest while gazing at the object of her intended affection.And its consistent, regardless of language, socioeconomic status , or religious upbringing. For men, says Rodgers, the fascination ritual is less submissive but no less standardized. Hell puff out his chest, jut his chin, arch his back, gesture with his hands and arms, and swagger in dominant motions to draw attention to his powerHow to get better at reading body languageFirst, pay attention. Sounds obvious but youre probably not doing it consistently throughout the conversation.Dynamics change, especially when youre dealing with someone who is actively trying to deceive you. Unless theyre very good, inconsistencies will arise (leakage) and you can get insight into how they really feel.Youll improve dramatically by addressing the four weaknesses pointed out in The Silent Language of LeadersConsider context Should someone in this situation be acting like this?Look for clusters of actions, not isolated ones All three of those behaviors are associated with?Get a baseline How do they normally act?Be aware of your biases Are you tempted to cut them sl ack and they havent started speaking yet?Your abilities will make a quantum leap if you realize that body language is part of a bigger context and a bigger cluster and you start monitoring the other facets of behavioral interaction voice, appearance, clothing, etc.These can help you evaluate the whole packageWhat does clothing tell you? How about shoes?What does someones voice tell you?What does a face tell you? How about a quick glance?What are 10 instances when you should trust your gut?Join over 285,000 readers and get a free weekly update via emailhere.Related postsHow To Be Resilient 8 Steps To Success When Life Gets HardWhat 10 things should you do every day to improve your life?How To Make Your Life Better By Sending Five Simple EmailsThis article originally appeared at Barking Up the Wrong Tree.4 secrets to reading body language like an expertHow important is body language?About55% of what you convey when you speak comes from body language. In fact, when youre speaking about something emotional only about 7% of what the other person hears has to do with the words you use.More often than not you can tell what a politician thinks about an issue just by watching their hands. Psychopaths can tell who would be a good victim just by watching them walk.In five minutes you can often evaluate people with approximately 70% accuracy. . .but obviously were wrong often, and that 30% can be very costly.What can the research teach us about better reading peoples body language?What youre doing wrongIn The Silent Language of Leaders How Body Language Can Helpor HurtHow You Lead the author points out a number of common errors people make.Heres how I interpreted the findingsIgnoring context Crossed arms dont mean as much if the room is cold or the chair theyre sitting in doesnt have armrests. Everything has to pass the common sense test given the environment.Not looking for clusters One of the biggest errors people make is looking for one single tell. Thats great in movi es about poker players but in real life its a consistent grouping of actions (sweating, touching the face, and stuttering together) that is really going to tell you something.Not getting a baseline If someone is always jumpy, jumpiness doesnt tell you anything. If someone is always jumpy and they suddenly stop moving - HELLO.Not being conscious of biases If you already like or dislike the person its going to affect your judgment. And if people compliment you, are similar to you, are attractive these can all sway you, unconsciously. I know, you dont fall for those tricks. Well, the biggest bias of all is thinking youre unbiased.What to focus onWhat signals can and should you trust when trying to get a read on someone? They need to be unconscious behaviors that are not easily controlled and convey a clear message.In Honest Signals How They Shape Our World, the authors point out three to keep your eye onSpeech mimicry and behavioral mimicry Are they using the same words you use? Speak ing at a similar speed and tone? Are they sitting the way you sit? Is a subtle, unconscious game of follow-the-leader going on? This is a sign the other person feels emotionally in sync with you. It can be faked but thats rare and difficult to pull off consistently across a conversation.Activity level As a general rule, activity levels indicate interest and excitement. (Often when a woman is bouncing her foot during a date it means shes interested in the man shes with.)Consistency of emphasis and timing This is a sign of focus and control. Someone who is less consistent is less sure of themselves and more open to influence.Specifics to look forContextually vetted, baseline adjusted clusters are your best bet but research has shown some specifics are often decent indicators.Crossed legs are a very bad sign during negotiations.Via The Silent Language of Leaders How Body Language Can Helpor HurtHow You LeadCrossed legs can have a devastating effect on a negotiation. In How to Read a Pe rson Like a Book, authors Gerard I. Nierenberg and Henry H. Calero reported that the number of times settlements were reached increased greatly when both negotiators had uncrossed their legs. In fact, they found that out of two thousand videotaped transactions, not one resulted in a settlement when even one of the negotiators had his or her legs crossed.Theres a consistent cluster that has been seen among people who are trying to cheat you.Via Wray Herbert, author of On Second Thought Outsmarting Your Minds Hard-Wired HabitsAgain and again, it was a cluster of four cues hand touching, face touching, crossing arms, and leaning away. None of these cues foretold deceit by itself, but together they transformed into a highly accurate signal. And the more often the participants used this particular cluster of gestures, the less trustworthy they were in the subsequent financial exchange.Who should you trust? Look for people who are consistently emotionally expressive in their body language These results suggest that cooperators may be more emotionally expressive than non-cooperators. We speculate that emotional expressivity can be a more reliable signal of cooperativeness than the display of positive emotion alone.And look at peoples hands. Palm down gestures indicate power. Palm up shows submission.The New York Times cites Adam Kendon, author of Gesture Visible Action as Utterance, on the deeper meaning of hand positionsGestures of the Open Hand Prone or palm down family are used in contexts where something is being denied, negated, interrupted or stopped, whether explicitly or by implication. Open hand Supine (or palm up) family gestures, on the other hand, are used in contexts where the speaker is offering, giving or showing something or requesting the reception of something . . .Keep in mind that men and women differ in body language. For instance, they flirt differentlyViaFascinate Your 7 Triggers to Persuasion and CaptivationA female begins fascinating a male by smiling at him, raising her brows to make her eyes appear wider and more childlike, quickly lowering her lids while tucking her chin slightly down, in an effort to bring him closer. After averting her gaze to the side, she will, within moments and almost without exception, put her hands on or near her mouth and giggle, lick her lips, or thrust out her chest while gazing at the object of her intended affection.And its consistent, regardless of language, socioeconomic status, or religious upbringing. For men, says Rodgers, the fascination ritual is less submissive but no less standardized. Hell puff out his chest, jut his chin, arch his back, gesture with his hands and arms, and swagger in dominant motions to draw attention to his powerHow to get better at reading body languageFirst, pay attention. Sounds obvious but youre probably not doing it consistently throughout the conversation.Dynamics change, especially when youre dealing with someone who is actively trying to deceive you. U nless theyre very good, inconsistencies will arise (leakage) and you can get insight into how they really feel.Youll improve dramatically by addressing the four weaknesses pointed out in The Silent Language of LeadersConsider context Should someone in this situation be acting like this?Look for clusters of actions, not isolated ones All three of those behaviors are associated with?Get a baseline How do they normally act?Be aware of your biases Are you tempted to cut them slack and they havent started speaking yet?Your abilities will make a quantum leap if you realize that body language is part of a bigger context and a bigger cluster and you start monitoring the other facets of behavioral interaction voice, appearance, clothing, etc.These can help you evaluate the whole packageWhat does clothing tell you? How about shoes?What does someones voice tell you?What does a face tell you? How about a quick glance?What are 10 instances when you should trust your gut?Join over 285,000 readers and get a free weekly update via emailhere.Related postsHow To Be Resilient 8 Steps To Success When Life Gets HardWhat 10 things should you do every day to improve your life?How To Make Your Life Better By Sending Five Simple EmailsThis article originally appeared at Barking Up the Wrong Tree.

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